Johnson and Johnson heiress died from licking Tila Tequila’s vagina, not drugs, says coroner

Not old age, insist doctors. Fans wonder who is going to be the next victim!

Pro golfer defiles heavenly virgins awaiting martyred terrorists, Gatorade pulls sponsorship due to Muslim pressure.

The golf star admits to infidelities, blames black culture.

The former reality star abandons kids at local grocery store and follows news camera crew, blames lack of media attention on her desire to leave family.

The infamous couple say they make monthly goat sacrifice to Baal, ancient god of good fortune, to overcome lack of skills, education, intelligence.

The one-time actor has testicles reattached after his original pair mysteriously disappear. Actor said to be “relieved,” and “looking forward to being a man again.”

Genetic testing reveals that Kelly Osbourne and her fiance Luke Worrall can only have albinos. Kelly devastated.

The talented actress has rejected youth and beauty in favor of a more grizzled look. Fashion world stunned by her daring and brilliance.

Fame-seeking father of “Balloon Boy” sets son on fire, blames lack of recent media attention.