Justin Bieber To Receive Pulitzer

Justin Bieber at VMA awards clutching his favorite book.

Bullies who once called playmate Justin Bieber a “cock-sucking bitch-ass gayface” will have another name for the teen sensation: Pulitzer prize winning author.

The singing and dancing phenomenon will add “award-winning writer” to his resume when his upcoming illustrated autobiography Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever: My Story hits stores worldwide later this fall. The book, penned by the 16 year old mop-haired crooner, will detail all of the exciting events that have occurred already in his short life.

Celebrity Freakshow obtained some of the juicier excerpts from the book:

“Sometimes I like to, like, put milk on my Froot Loops and, like, sometimes I don’t. It just depends on my mood, girl.”

“I like girls and stuff, but mostly girls. Stuff’s cool, though, too. You know? It’s the best when girls like stuff, too. Know what I mean, girl?”

“That’s crazy cool and whatever, but I’m like, really cool on whatever my girl likes. It’s like awesome and stuff when a girl and I like stuff together.”

“Being with a girl is neat and stuff, because I get really happy inside and, like, butterflies are in my tummy and stuff. But I like being with boys, too, and that’s cool, because that makes my dick get hard as a rock, girl.”

Accompanying the riveting text are pictures drawn by Justin himself, many of which shed light on Justin’s words. Here is one released by HarperCollins that shows “Justin’s psychological state after he bottomed for the first time,” said Bieber’s publicist.

Justin Bieber drew this after being the anal receptive partner in gay sex, said his publicist.

Pulitzer officials released a statement about the book, saying that they have already given it their non-fiction award for the year despite the fact that it has yet to be published. They explained the hasty awarding as “necessary considering the brilliance of the prose and the profound meaning of the text on the lives of America’s youth.”

The book will hit stores in October.